All Along The Watchtower

I always liked nights better than the day. The sky looks so glamorous . Its peacefulness , so comforting. Its openness, so overwhelming.

At this point of my life, 17 years and a few months after i took my first breath in this crazy little cosmos of ours, I'm lost. And confused, as my blog name suggests.
Being a teenager in this country is anything but easy.
Well, its tough whichever country you are in, but somehow our beloved nation just takes the cake.

The pressure to prove oneself to the people, the attempt to suppress certain desires in order to prove oneself to the people, the attempt to suppress that want of rebellion in order to prove oneself to the people, the ignorance of the sheer joys of life like dancing in the rain, talking about all the things under the sun with your friends, going for a trek, getting familiar with nature.. et al.

And for us unlucky ones who have for some God forsaken reason have taken up science so as to make a career out of it( which is like 85% of our Indian population) , we seem to be stuck in the mundane rut of study, assignments, lectures, projects.

And i can firmly say that hardly 7% of the 85% actually enjoy it. I mean, genuinely get a sheer pleasure out of it. While the rest of us, we're just stuck between this eternal struggle of suppressing our true inner talent so we can pick up those hard hats in one hand and computer cables in the other and call ourselves engineers. ( Medicine is even worse. But they're just like 2% of the 85%)
It all disgusts me. The suppression. The one way path. The hypocrisy shown by "society" when that one way path is not taken.

I had been told as a kid that i should take up that one thing as a career which i love. That one subject with which i am ready to spend my whole life. And enjoy it.

But now, as i stand here with a plethora of opinions about which engg college is the best, gives the best placements, pays most money. And why would anyone do anything but engineering? Its the fastest way to get a job and earn decent money.

And i couldn't be more confused.
No wonder the blog land is filled with this huge chunk of Indian teen population bitching about their college/classes/career options/teachers/subjects day after day.
I thought education was all about gaining knowledge, about how you apply it in life.About how it makes u literate to decide the right things in life which clear perspective and reason.And so, it wouldnt matter if one is taking up science or arts or whatever.
It seems anything but that now. All education has become is memorising random facts and vomitting it out, a huge money making marketting thing and another field to show off your power in our so called society.

How it all disgusts me.
Too tired to go on any further. Will continue about this sucky part of our lives later.

P.S - What's worse is that i hear it gets even worse once you are an adult.